How to Really Enjoy your Kids and Kick Exhaustion to the Wayside

Years ago as a young mother in the throes of mom exhaustion, I commiserated with an older friend. She had more children than me at the time and was a voice of experience. She said something to me that I will never forget and quickly catapulted me into the realm of responsible adulthood.

My friend told me that when she had to get up in the middle of the night to feed her baby or to care for her children, she never looked at the clock by her bed. She never looked at the clock!

Looking at her clock would only make her think about the amount of sleep that she was losing or the short amount of time she had left to sleep until morning, and would only make her anxious or resentful. She made the conscious decision not to look at her clock because she refused to allow that negativity to come into her life!

Isn’t it amazing the giants that normal people become when facing everyday adversity? My friend became a veritable hero in my eyes by simply framing her routine nightly actions as her driving purpose.

Don’t Give Energy to the Negative

In other words, I learned from her at that moment that when we face something that we can’t change, don’t give it energy. Don’t stress over it, don’t resent it and above all don’t complain about it. It is our responsibility and really our privilege to transform hardships in our lives into a daily sense of purpose.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that we shouldn’t look for solutions. In fact, that’s what this article is all about. But my friend taught me, that how we choose to look at the challenges in our life is really so important! If we choose to focus on the positive, the hardships in our lives will seem a whole lot easier. This allows us to really enjoy the gifts that we have.

As a young Mom of a large family, I was often exhausted. I think that I probably didn’t sleep for about ten years! I kid you not.

In order to survive, I first had to take on the mindset that my friend had gifted me. But then I had to come up with some strategies to cope because I didn’t want my family to suffer from a mom who personified exhaustion. On the other hand, I also didn’t want my health to suffer (which was not always easy!)

I also was always doing some kind of work from home, and a lot of times it had to do with writing or speaking. I was always involved in something. Planning an event, writing a children’s book, editing other people’s work, or writing content for my freelance speaking. I was always busy with something.

To add spice to the mix, I lived outside of my home country (the US) and my kids were home most days by 1:30 pm as school was from 8:00 to 1:00 each day. That meant that the kids were home for a good part of the day as well as for lunch and for dinner!

So in order to survive (and thrive), there were certain life-saving systems that I learned to lead a highly functioning life and be present to enjoy my kids when they got home. And here are some brief ideas as to how you can use them too!

Planning Your Days

I had to really plan my days and make sure that I could accomplish most things before my kids came home. When my baby napped, I would work. To get everything done, I had to laser focus and not be waylaid by unimportant distractions.

This forced me to formulate clear goals each day because I had limited time to accomplish them. I created systems that were really helpful and hopefully I’ll be able to share them with you in the future.

Now let’s talk about the little things that I did that really allowed me to thrive in my busy schedule. I really hope that some of them can be helpful to you!

Healthy Diet and Supplements to Avoid Exhaustion

Moms need energy and a diet of caffeine and sugar will undermine even the most sprightly mom. A morning cup of coffee is great but relying on coffee and sugar to get through the day, is a recipe for trouble.

Sit down for a good breakfast – your body will thank you. If you are rushing to work, prepare a healthy smoothie that will give you energy for the whole day.

I prepare a healthy smoothie in the morning before I leave to work. You can also prepare a smoothie at night before you go to bed. You can either drink it on the way or when you get to work. I use Dr. Schultz’s superfood in my smoothie every day. It gives me super nutrition and helps me stay energetic throughout the day. I add berries for antioxidants and sometimes a vegetable protein powder such as Garden of Life Raw Meal for extra protein and vitamins.

You can take your own healthy supplements and make sure to eat a healthy breakfast. Eating well in the morning is essential to fuel your entire day.

If you crave sweets, have protein as a snack between breakfast and lunch, and then again between lunch and dinner. Have a hard-boiled egg and some raw veggies or some nuts or hummus. You will be surprised how eating good nutrition throughout the day will boost your energy and reduce sugar cravings

Meals in Bulk

When we have many responsibilities each day, meal prep can be a real burden. However, we can simplify our meal prep by making certain things ahead of time. I often made chicken (with a sauce), pizza crusts, beef or fish patties, meatballs in bulk and froze them. You can prepare and freeze all kinds of healthy casseroles.

You will have to see what works for your family and what they like. Always double what you are making so that you can freeze it for later. This saves time on meal prep when you’re in a hurry or pressed for time.

Cleaning Help

When I had small children, I hired regular cleaning help at least once a week. I sacrificed a lot of other things to have that help. However, I let go of so much stress because I didn’t have to push myself to a state of exhaustion. I knew someone else would do the heavy cleaning.

So how did all of this help me enjoy my kids? The above tips helped me with physical exhaustion but it was the following tips that allowed me the framework to then be able to enjoy my kids.

Taking care of myself made a big difference and reduced a lot of stress.

These next steps really helped me enjoy my kids and dispel the exhaustion.

Quiet Time

I mentioned that my kids came home from school quite early. I would give my kids lunch and then we all did something magical. We would all have a short rest in the middle of the day! This was called “quiet time”

Everyone had to go to their rooms and lie down. They did not have to sleep but the kids had to be in bed. They could read but the idea was really to rest. This gave my kids a chance to relax and unwind from school but also gave me a chance to rest and prepare for the afternoon so that I could enjoy them. It also gave me the strength to make it through the day without collapsing in exhaustion!

After about forty minutes of “quiet time” we all got up. The kids were relaxed, I was refreshed and we all enjoyed each other, going out to the park or doing fun activities together.

If your kids get home from school late this may not work for your schedule. However, it might work for you during the summer when the kids are home or even on the weekends.

Babysitters

If there was one thing that I spent my money on besides cleaning help when my kids were small- it was babysitters! If I was pregnant and needed to rest or if I wasn’t feeling well, I always arranged babysitters to go out with my kids to the park and often to help with the nightly routine.

This also helped me to enjoy my kids and get the rest I needed, depending on what was going on at home. In this way, my kids were able to play outside, I wasn’t in a constant state of exhaustion and I really enjoyed my kids when they came home.

This did take some planning and learning how to carefully interview and instruct my “employees” but it did help our home to run efficiently and happily

Getting Out with Your Spouse

One of the most important things that helped me enjoy my kids was making sure to get out with my husband. It was sometimes a challenge but my husband and I really worked to make “date night” happen.

We usually really wanted some alone time together so it was usually just having dinner together in a restaurant so that we could talk and have time together away from the kids. It didn’t happen every month or sometimes not for a couple of months but we really tried to get out every once in a while.

Even if we didn’t go out, we aimed for alone time together after the kids were in bed. We then talked over our day and connected for a while. The kids knew that this was our time together. They understood that after a certain hour they couldn’t disturb us (except for emergencies of course).

I believe that it was comforting for my kids to know that it was important for us to have that time alone each night. Our “alone’ time energized us and definitely helped me to beat the exhaustion.

So these are some of the things that I implemented in my life to stay positive, enjoy my kids and defeat exhaustion. They may seem small, but applied consistently they made a big difference. I hope that some of these can be helpful to you or at least give you some ideas that you can implement in your home!

So go out and enjoy your kids and beat that exhaustion. Please let me know if any of these things have worked for you or other ideas that you have. If you have enjoyed this post please comment below and like and share with your friends.